What are prison inmates generally like? The average inmate is under 25 years of age. About 96% are men, and 3 or 4% are women. Many come from broken homes, or a home that had little love or discipline. However, some come from good homes, and some even come from good solid Christian homes. Most are accustomed to doing whatever they want to do.
They have had an average of nine years of education, but have only acquired an actual seventh grade level (in some areas it is considerably lower); they have failed a couple of grades here or there. On the other hand, some have a university education.
The offender may be a first time offender, or a multiple offender. He or she may have committed a minor or a major offense. Perhaps the most important thing to remember is that he could be anyone at all. The offender is not a problem person, but a person with problems. Everyone has problems, and everyone is capable of committing an offense. The average offender is a very ordinary Joe, who hasn’t been particularly successful at anything, not even being a criminal, or he wouldn’t be in one of our institutions.
In jail, the inmate realizes the impact of loneliness. Perhaps for the first time he has been separated from his family and friends. He may have an occasional controlled visit from a relative or friend, but this is never very natural–it may be with a glass partition between, talking on a telephone or through a little mesh at the bottom.
He may have very few acceptable inter-personal relationships. In prison he tends to seek out his own kind. In an unnatural single sex environment, like prison, homosexual invitations, pressures, and practices do occur.
He feels he is the victim of injustice. He finds it very hard to face the fact that he is personally responsible for his own imprisonment. If he did have some religious training in his childhood, he now feels that God has let him down. If he is a believer, he may doubt his own security, and he is not at all sure God will hear and answer his prayers. On the other hand, he may thank God for stopping him in his tracks. If he’s never had any Christian training, he may assume that God and church are for others, and not for him. He does not understand the good news of the gospel, and he will not understand our common Christian language.
What does an inmate really need? He needs Christian friends who can show genuine concern for him without leaving the impression of being “holier than thou.” This friend may be a chaplain, another inmate, a correctional officer, or a friend on the street. He needs a friend who can listen more than talk, and through wise and loving questioning can lead him to explore some alternatives to his problems. He needs to establish worthwhile relationships with you and others, based on mutual trust, respect, honesty, and understanding.
If he is a Christian, he may need reassurance of the security of the believer–the personal value that he has as a child of God, and the knowledge that even though he has sinned, he has in Jesus Christ an advocate with the Father.
The non-Christian inmate needs to know that God loves him, that the Lord Jesus died for him, and that God wants him to be a member of His family. But he also needs to know that you love him as a person, and the opportunity for you to share your faith may not come in the first moments of conversation.
Only the Holy Spirit can convict of sin, and convert the soul. You will need to be led by the Holy Spirit. He needs to know that he can trust you to care for him, and that you will not fall for the games he may try to play with or on you, but that you will continue to love him in spite of him, even as God loves us.
Before starting visiting prisoners, it’s important that you first of all know for sure that the Lord has called you to this type of ministry. It’s not a ministry for everyone. It’s not for novices, and certainly not for glory seekers. It would also be very helpful to have your assembly behind you for prayer and support. Let others know of your interest in being involved. Take any volunteer training that is available, either through the institution, or through your sponsoring ministry. Get to know the regulations of the local institutions, the times of visitation, and the chaplain or volunteer coordinator.
Have a very realistic view of your time commitment. Prison ministry can become a bottomless pit. And if you’re not careful, you can end up giving more than you can rightly afford.
If at all possible, work within a group, or with a partner. This will allow for sharing, praying, and counseling together, and also will help avoid the martyr syndrome. “I’m the only one going in, and I’ve done this for three years, and it’s storming out, yet I’m going in…”
Visit your new friend regularly and consistently. We need to be consistent. Whether it be once a week, twice a month, or even once per month, your person will be counting on you, and generally speaking he has been let down too many times already. If you must cancel, let him know through the proper channels, and reschedule another time with him.
Obey all the rules. Don’t smuggle anything in or out–not even a correspondence course. One time an inmate gave me a Bible correspondence lesson, and said, “Let me just give this to you so we don’t have to wait for the mail.” That was fine, but I said I would give it to the officer first. The officer was standing right there, so he flipped through it and gave it back. Another time the officer read the entire thing. However the officer handles it, the inmate needs to know it will be checked and you follow the rules of the institution. A lot of this is covered in the book, Games Criminals Play.
Don’t get involved in inmates’ legal matters. Leave that to the lawyer. Don’t get involved in his financial matters. Remember at first most prisoners see you as only someone to run errands for them. Your mission is to offer friendship, and to talk with them over moral and spiritual matters. If you are a woman visiting a male inmate–which is not a good idea, unless he perceives you as his great-grandmother–he may see every kind word as an indication that you have a romantic interest in him. Remember he is locked up, in a very unnatural situation for a long, long time.
Respect the inmate’s right to confidentiality. This involves not mentioning names or situations to others. Exceptions to this would be learning of attempted suicide, hostage taking, or escapes. You do need to report that, either to a chaplain, or to an officer. Everything else is confidential. You don’t go and talk to people at the assembly about what you’ve just been doing. That needs to stay confidential also.
Don’t be curious as to what crime has been committed. Sometimes it’s better for you not to know. Sometimes I prefer not knowing, because then I can talk to him as a person. Sometimes the crimes that they have committed are very horrendous and it’s easier to simply talk to them, listen to them, and share with them if we don’t know. Sometimes they will tell you, and that’s okay. Just accept it as a matter of fact, and on you go.
The book Twice Pardoned is an excellent book, because it will give you a good idea of what prison life is like in America.