I had been asked to attend a conference on the south shore of the breathtaking Lake Geneva which lies between the Alps of Switzerland and France, like a blue ribbon uncertain which range should receive first prize for its surpassing beauty. Around its shore lie the historic cities of Montreux, Vevey, Lausanne, Geneva, and Evian (fabled for its clear spring water) near which the conference was to be held.
When they asked me to speak on the subject of the family, I told them they had the wrong man for the job. True, I had belonged to a family as far back as I could remember. The Lord had given me a partner whose price was far above rubies. We now have been blessed with six children. And in my travels, I have been introduced to families in a wide variety of types and situations. But I was still uncomfortable with my assignment.
There is a group of experts on the subject who are kindred with David and Solomon. Sad-eyed, they have learned what not to do by bitter experience. They have much to teach us and we do well to heed their advice. By God’s grace alone, at that time I did not belong with these experts.
Another contingent have all the answers simply because they have not yet faced the questions. Long on advice, short on experience, they smile vacuously as they hear the difficulty expressed, and before the whole matter is out (Prov. 18:13), they have concluded with an “obvious” solution. They can give you all the statistics. But it is not a statistic I gather in my arms at bedtime and place love’s token on their cheek. Each child, composed by the Creator from an infinite number of combinations, is unique. Is this the Master’s way of keeping us from becoming self-sufficient and so casting us back upon Him for the wisdom which is from above?
There are some who have had the joy of seeing their children “walk in the truth.” If they were of the world, they might find cause to boast, but life has taught them too much of the grace of God to presume so. If you ask them for their opinion on the matter, they will often smile and get a faraway look as they think of the times it could have been very different. But the Lord had graciously intervened and restored the family, perhaps in answer to some prayer of long ago and far away.
I finally consented to go, but only on the condition that I would not talk experience, or opinion. We would rely solely on the Blessed Book.
Among the multitude of colorful, true-to-life Bible characters, I set out to find a model home which we could tour together to our profit. Surely I could find one. Let’s see . . . Adam, Noah, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, Samuel, David — the Old Testament families go by, each marked by some fatal flaw. We’re not talking about a squabble here, a difficulty there. Each had serious problems. Is the family under siege today? It has been since the first woman overturned the divine order and the first child rose up to slay his brother!
Why is the family under such a virulent campaign of sabotage? Because it was God’s idea! He set the solitary in families (Ps. 68:6). And because it is one of the lines of authority He has established in creation, and wherever there is the expression of God’s authority, you can be sure the enemy will continue the fight against it which he began in the throne-room of the universe.
The New Testament was not able to provide me a complete model home either. Young Timothy and his mother and grandmother are delightful vignettes, but where are the menfolk? Who could find a more exemplary couple than Aquila and Priscilla but there are no children mentioned.
I did find my model home, however. Earthly relationships will no longer exist in eternity. But there are eternal familial relationships, those after which the families of earth were patterned.
There are only three basic relations: parent and children, husband and wife, brother and sister. Would you like to study parenting? You have the best Father in the universe! Then bring up your children in the way you have learned from your Father (Eph. 6:4). Would you desire the secret of a blessed marriage? Then look to the Bridegroom who loved His Bride and gave Himself for it (Eph. 5:22-33). Would you understand sibling relations? The gracious Spirit, who provides the “bond of peace” between brother and sister in the Church (Eph. 4:2-3) will be your teacher.
Here was my model home. And, by the way, it’s always Open House in heaven.
Written by J. B. Nicholson